hati..

life's a bit busy lately..office and side income.. Zaid, a young businessman which now became my friend, always tell me the opportunity of business that he has thru his company. Got two things that need to be settle

1) A4 paper -- chance to supply A4 paper to Abu Dhabi. Managed to get a funder and also supplier to this project. Waiting for agreement signing. Planned to take USD0.20 per ream (2millions reams per month)..Estimated to have USD400,000 per month after contract signed. Praying hard that wont be any problems afterwards. Waiting for signing contract and later go to Indonesia for factory visit. InsyaAllah..Please pray for me.

2) Sime Darby -- still negotiating for the terms and if satisfied, will put some money (RM50k) for investment.

3) Car - Mercedes C200K and C240 already bought. Will be shipped to Malaysia next week, InsyaAllah.

p/s : pray that I'll be success in everything I did, insyaAllah.

Back to topic, Hati..My friend asked me, sure you are single? She didn't believe it as before I am always with women. Maybe it's now my turn to feel the pain caused by love. If I could remember, not less than 15 women I have been with (so called love and scandal). Before, before I know how true love felt like. Before my heart opened by a simple word JOM SOLAT.

None of the women I dated before, asked me to do pious thing(s). Never. The usual words are SHOPPING, DATING, CINEMA etc. Thats it. I think thats why things didn't work out for my previous relationships.

school, diploma, degree = easy relationships

now = no longer searching for the kind of relationships I had before.

Its true that once you are already changed, things changes too. I tend to look for somebody that is beautiful inside and outside, not just physically attractive like previous relationships. Please pray that I will be like this, no longer fooling around with women's love, no longer being the person who only pray when having problems, the person I used to be should remain HISTORY.

Ya Allah, tetapkan hati ku pada Mu. Limpahkan ku nikmat rezeki yang melimpah ruah dan keberkatan dari rezeki itu. Ampunilah dosa2 ku,dosa ibu bapa ku, keluarga ku, kawan2 ku, dan semua saudara2 seislam ku. Cepatkanlah jodoh ku dan temukanlah ku dengan jodoh terbaik dari Mu. Amin ya rabbal alamin.

:)

Cinta, karya indah Sang Pencipta, Dimulakan di syurga, Dirasukkan dalam jiwa Adam dan Hawa, Lalu dipinak-pinakkan dalam setiap jiwa dengan kadar yang berbeza.. :)

its true..sangat sangat betul :)

hurm,my weekend was quite okay. Went to my eldest bro's home and spend my time with my sweet Ayish. "pak teh,pak teh..lari cepat..hantu dekat belakang tu" was the first word that greets me when Ayish saw me coming. Put my things and kiss him few times. How can I stop kissing this adorable kid?

Next day, I promised him to bring him to Alamanda. So, he was at his best mood and just follow whatever I said. So, at 5pm we went to Alamanda together with my younger sis, Kak Yah. Took Ayish to game arcade and just give him the token and said, today you can play anything you want. Surprisingly that he's not interested with the kid's game. Want to play soccer game,car racing and all sorts of teenage's game. "Alamak,dah mati lah pulak.. Nak main yang lain pulak la Pak Teh"..he said that everytime its game over. :)

Later on the way back home,he said that.." Pak Teh,nak KFC"..even I dont prefer fast food, but I'll make an exception for him.. Chicky meal for him, snack plate for me and X-meal combo for kak yah.. Ayish ate all that and even asked for my mashed potato.. dared him to take the chilli sauce and he did. hehe. :)

After KFC, time to go back home and sent kak yah to UKM..

quote of the day

Don't leave the one you love for the one you like because the one you like will leave you for the one they love

So true right?Hehe..Not in the sad state of emotions anymore but just want to share my thoughts. I certainly agrees with this quote. We tend to forget all the good things that someone that we love before or care for when we met somebody that we like. Make it his/her attitude/looks/money/car etc.

I did and done with this. During my "zaman jahiliyah" @ campus life, I can't remember how many times I did. Men attracted with girls who have her good side plus with a bad side also. Kinda mix of both attitude. It sure is an adventure for we men. Let say you already have a girlfriend or claim to be a girlfriend, you do love her but, when she's not around, you are easily attracted to someone else. A girl walking in the evening with her jogging outfit or sexier than yours, certainly will trigger the switch in your head. I mean the real head, up above. You tend to have her number, flirting around. And, bye2 miss girlfriend for that time. You would claim that you are single. :)

And I did before. But, now no more. There will be a time that your wisdom will take its place and not the emotions. You'll realize your age,your future,vision and all sort of things never been think of before. So, love the person that love you and appreciate them as once they found somebody they like or adore, it sure is a BYE2 for you.

So, done with the philosophy. As for my daily life, last night got two more potential customer. If they agrees to buy that mercedes and BMW, RM50,000 minimum will be mine. Pray to Allah for that all the blessing and oppurtunity that He given me. Alhamdulillah. Waiting for 2 Merce to arrive here in Malaysia in another 2 months (C200K and C240). Pray that everything run smoothly.

And also yesterday we had an open house session for my office. It was like, eat,eat,eat and eat some more. It was fun though if I neglected the person who did scold me in front of 5 people with no reason who had been invited by my boss. I can still remember this lecturer's word as he said to me " WHO ARE YOU TO ASK FOR MY PAPER? WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?" . Back then, I was just asking for his paper like my boss said and already introduced myself as an OFFICER. The way that he treat me like I was kinda low-class people. Wish that I wont treat anybody like that in my life.

so,there goes my boring life yesterday. :) Is there anymore Si Gadis out there?

Ikhlas kan hati

My day as single guy starts today. Learnt on how to just let go. Let go of Si Gadis, let go of my love for a while and let go of all the sorrows.

My little sister (kak yah) chatted with me on Facebook today. Said that his Abang Teh need to chill out and not changing a bit like I used to be. I am 26 with a funny attitude and happy go lucky guy. Never been down and just make people smile with my silly jokes and acts. I will sis, you can count on me. Maybe she want me to stay single so that I can be her banker whenever she asked me to go shopping with her? :) that's my little sis.. But one thing I am quite sad is when kak yah said that mom was excited before and quite sad when she knows that its not working out for me. I am sorry mom! Later, when there is somebody who I care and love, I will make you happy again. But, nobody blames Si Gadis as it's not her fault. Please don't feel guilty Si Gadis. :)

Also today I did msg Si Gadis's mom and said that I am taking all of this as a matured man and hope that she still okay with me and the silaturrahim (bonding) that we had will remains. She quite surprised that I can still be happy and think positively. Aunty, there's nothing much to do when it comes to heart matters, i replied. It's all Allah's decision and fated. Who knows what will happen in the future. Right? She also did mentioned on her wish for me to be a good man and success in whatever I do in the future. Lastly, said that I am sorry if I am being too open about my intention and said that I just respect her right as Si Gadis's mom and she deserve to know if I am going to do anything. Alhamdulillah, aunty is okay and still called me "nak" (son). Praise to Allah.

As for my work life, quite busy today as few students come and asked for my help. They are quite scared with their FYP (Final Year Project) and did asked for my help and opinion. Happy to help them as I used to face the same problems before back in student's life. Good luck guys, you guys have my support. :)

Hello world..give me a reason to smile..

and finally

And finally..last night I got my answer. It's a NO.hehehe.. serve me right.

Sms her last night and after a few sms, she said that she's sorry that she can't accept it.

Typical answers like I am too good for her and so on.. But, it's okay. Accept it as a man.

The truth is that she already have a guy that she love. That's the ONLY reason. If she said it during the first time I met her, it will be okay. So, I won't hoping more than just a friend.

I can still remember when I asked her for the very first time.. "Awak ngan sape skang ni?da de ngan sape2 or still single?"..and she replied "I am still single and malas dah nak pikir2 bab lelaki"..lebih kurang macam tu la reply nya..

So, that's the only thing that I regretted. If you are attached to somebody, please just say it. Not by denying it at the first place. A friend is better happy than a guy hurt in the process of knowing you.

But, there are few things that I am grateful since the day I met her;

1) she made me closer to Allah by just saying JOM SOLAT to me. From that day onwards, Alhamdulillah I am not simply neglecting my prayer.

2) she made me to appreciate girl better. Before I would just flirt around and have a few girls at the same time to hang out,flirting and keeping myself not boring.

3) she made me cry. In a good way I mean. I never cried during my pray and asking for Allah's help, I felt so little compared to what Allah's power can change somebody's heart

4) She made me closer to my parent. I never tell my parent before about things like girl,feeling or love. And last week I did told my parent of my proposal to her and they are shocked. SHOCKED that their once stubborn and rebellious son changed and willing to share my problem with them.

5) she made me to be more passionate of changing myself to be a better person. I am starting to have my own saving (already enough to have my own wedding), pursuing my master (MBA) and my business is on a good track. Hoping for hundreds thousand of profit next year.Alhamdulillah,praise to Allah.

6) she made me know how to be sincere then you are truly in love. Did say to her that I am hoping that she found her happiness and that guy will make her happy the way I imagined myself making her happy in my sms to her last night. And I really meant it as her happiness is all i want even I am not in the picture.

7) she made me a romantic person? I never bought a gift i.e. gold ring to any girl before. I never bought a girl roses for our date. I never bring a girl for her birthday celebration;a table for two set with a view of KL city from up above,birthday song played when all the focus on our table with the waitress singing birthday song together with the rest of restaurant crew and some disco light. The way I imagined it in my head, thanks to the novel.

8) before I knew her, I am just enjoying the flirting part in the process of knowing a girl. But, now no more. Bye2 all that flirting scene.

9) she made me to be who I am this moment. A guy who wants to be better in all aspect (relationship,career,financial,emotions and etc.)

10) thanks Si Gadis and Alhamdulillah that Allah gave me this chance.

And the worst part of my decision only one thing only;

I need to reply back to my dad as yesterday he did called me whether he can go there and do all those proposal for me. I just said that I don't know whether she accept or not. So, today I will inform him that just forget about all those thing for time being and maybe later,InsyaAllah.

Just pray that I will found another version of Si Gadis that will love me the way I love her. And also pray that Si Gadis will be happy with her choice and have a happy life ahead. You have my prayer for sure.

And the journey continues.

Song of the day: FEELINGS by Morris Albert, click here